User: "Brown jacket"
Me: "Excuse me?"
User: "Brown jacket"
Me: "hmmm...did you loose one?"
User: "yes"
User: "Do I have to be using a computer with a scanner to scan?"
User: "Do you have....umm....umm...[1 min later]... stapler?"
User: "How do use this copy card here?"
Me: "That card says library on it"
User: "Where is the QQQQ Building?"
Me: "On QQQQ Street"
User: "Where is the color printer thing?"
User: "Do you have a staple taker-outer?"
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Monday, October 25, 2010
Brain Freeze
User: "Can you help me with something? I don't know how to print on a mac"
Me: "Okay, let me show you how, where are you logged in?"
User: "I'm not"
Me: "ummmm......okay, well once you log in, let me know if you have any issues"
User: "I'm technology challenged, how does the copier work?"
Me: "All you have to do swipe your ID at the card reader, put the document on the flatbed and click start"
.....A few minutes later....
User: "where do I put my document, I'm confused"
Me: "That's the color printer, the copier is over there"
User: "Hey, this pen ran out of ink, can I have another one?"
Me: "Here you go"
User: "Thanks, here you can have this [dead] one back"
User: "Can you show me how to use the 3-hole punch?"
User: [with deer in headlights look]
Me: "Can I help you with something?"
User: "ummm......ummm"
Me: "So are you just aimlessly wandering around?"
User: "Yes"
Me: "Okay, let me show you how, where are you logged in?"
User: "I'm not"
Me: "ummmm......okay, well once you log in, let me know if you have any issues"
User: "I'm technology challenged, how does the copier work?"
Me: "All you have to do swipe your ID at the card reader, put the document on the flatbed and click start"
.....A few minutes later....
User: "where do I put my document, I'm confused"
Me: "That's the color printer, the copier is over there"
User: "Hey, this pen ran out of ink, can I have another one?"
Me: "Here you go"
User: "Thanks, here you can have this [dead] one back"
User: "Can you show me how to use the 3-hole punch?"
User: [with deer in headlights look]
Me: "Can I help you with something?"
User: "ummm......ummm"
Me: "So are you just aimlessly wandering around?"
User: "Yes"
Friday, October 15, 2010
Finding their Way
User: "How do you demagnify a computer?"
User: "Do you know where I can find the _____ computing site?"
Me: "You're in it right now?"
User: "Really? are you sure?"
User: "I can't seem to find the document I printed"
Me: "Which computer did you print from?"
User: "I don't know"
User: "Do you have a folder I can borrow for an interview?"
User: "I hate computers, can you help me out?"
User: "Do you help with technology?"
User: "Am I allowed to use a USB port?"
User: "Which of the computers have scanners?"
User: "How do I find this printer?"
User: "So we have to bring our own headphones?"
User (awkwardly stares at consultant from distance)
Me: "Can I help you..............with something..............?"
User: "Is there a computer available?"
User: "Do you have a pen I can borrow?"
Me: "I'm sorry, we don't"
User: "What about the one in your hand?"
Me: "I'm using it"
User: "I just need it for a minute or two"
User: "Do you have an envelope?"
Me: "No, sorry"
User: "Not even for me?"
User: "Do you know where I can find the _____ computing site?"
Me: "You're in it right now?"
User: "Really? are you sure?"
User: "I can't seem to find the document I printed"
Me: "Which computer did you print from?"
User: "I don't know"
User: "Do you have a folder I can borrow for an interview?"
User: "I hate computers, can you help me out?"
User: "Do you help with technology?"
User: "Am I allowed to use a USB port?"
User: "Which of the computers have scanners?"
User: "How do I find this printer?"
User: "So we have to bring our own headphones?"
User (awkwardly stares at consultant from distance)
Me: "Can I help you..............with something..............?"
User: "Is there a computer available?"
User: "Do you have a pen I can borrow?"
Me: "I'm sorry, we don't"
User: "What about the one in your hand?"
Me: "I'm using it"
User: "I just need it for a minute or two"
User: "Do you have an envelope?"
Me: "No, sorry"
User: "Not even for me?"
Thursday, March 11, 2010
March Madness
User: "Are you a computer technician?"
Me: "I guess so, what's up?"
User: "one of the computers doesn't log in so I turned it off"
User: "So I have a pdf, what program do I use to open that?"
Me: "Acrobat Pro 9 is your best bet"
User: "What if I want to edit it"
Me: "That program will do it"
User: "Can I print off that or do I have to import it into Reader?"
Me: "Basically Pro is a reader and editor"
User: "So can I print?"
User: "I have a random question, is engine oil and motor oil the same thing?"
Me: "eh yes"
User: "so when they change the oil its the same thing I check with the stick?"
User: "Do you have a stapler?"
Me: "It's by the signs next to the printers"
User: "I don't want to read"
Me: "The sign has a picture of a stapler on it"
User: "okay"
User: "Do you know what's wrong with the copy machine, it doesn't seem to be on?"
User: "Can I use that phone?"
Me: "for what purpose, this one can't dial out"
User: "I want to call someone to fix the printers"
User: "I can't get the thing to work with the ...thing...ugh, can you help me with this thing?"
Me: "I guess so, what's up?"
User: "one of the computers doesn't log in so I turned it off"
User: "So I have a pdf, what program do I use to open that?"
Me: "Acrobat Pro 9 is your best bet"
User: "What if I want to edit it"
Me: "That program will do it"
User: "Can I print off that or do I have to import it into Reader?"
Me: "Basically Pro is a reader and editor"
User: "So can I print?"
User: "I have a random question, is engine oil and motor oil the same thing?"
Me: "eh yes"
User: "so when they change the oil its the same thing I check with the stick?"
User: "Do you have a stapler?"
Me: "It's by the signs next to the printers"
User: "I don't want to read"
Me: "The sign has a picture of a stapler on it"
User: "okay"
User: "Do you know what's wrong with the copy machine, it doesn't seem to be on?"
User: "Can I use that phone?"
Me: "for what purpose, this one can't dial out"
User: "I want to call someone to fix the printers"
User: "I can't get the thing to work with the ...thing...ugh, can you help me with this thing?"
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
The Snow is Getting to People
User: "The computer didn't do what I told it to do"
User: "You wouldn't happen to have packaging tape would you?"
User: "I'm trying to use the copier, but it keeps on printing, no matter how many times I press the number 1"
Me: After taking a look..."You have it set to make 11,111 copies, let me cancel this for you"
User: "You wouldn't happen to have packaging tape would you?"
User: "I'm trying to use the copier, but it keeps on printing, no matter how many times I press the number 1"
Me: After taking a look..."You have it set to make 11,111 copies, let me cancel this for you"
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Where's Darwin When You Need Him?
User: "Is there a way I can scan a document into a computer?"
User: "Someone told me there's a FedEx drop-off location here"
User: "Yo dog, you got a stapler down here man?"
User: "Do you have tape?"
Me: "yeah, by the printers"
User: "No, I mean duct tape"
Me: "No"
User: "How about a spare screw?"
Me: "No"
User: "The signs say you have staplers but I can't find them"
Me: "They're on the tables by the printers"
User: "Like behind the printers? I don't see them"
Me: "On the table next to the stapler sign"
User: "Oh I didn't know that was a stapler"
User: "Someone told me there's a FedEx drop-off location here"
User: "Yo dog, you got a stapler down here man?"
User: "Do you have tape?"
Me: "yeah, by the printers"
User: "No, I mean duct tape"
Me: "No"
User: "How about a spare screw?"
Me: "No"
User: "The signs say you have staplers but I can't find them"
Me: "They're on the tables by the printers"
User: "Like behind the printers? I don't see them"
Me: "On the table next to the stapler sign"
User: "Oh I didn't know that was a stapler"
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Welcome Back
User: "What button do I press on the scanner to scan something"
Me: "Can I help you with something?"
User: "No Sorry, I stepped into the wrong place, I must leave"
User: "I just posted fliers outside, do you know when they'll get taken down?"
User: "Is there a paper slicer thing here?"
Instructor: "the projector isn't working"
Me: "Let me see...All you have to do is turn it on"
--5 minutes later--
Instructor: "The computer is typing in Chinese now"
Me: "oh the screen resolution is high so you can't read the text from the projector; It's still in english"
Me: "Can I help you with something?"
User: "No Sorry, I stepped into the wrong place, I must leave"
User: "I just posted fliers outside, do you know when they'll get taken down?"
User: "Is there a paper slicer thing here?"
Instructor: "the projector isn't working"
Me: "Let me see...All you have to do is turn it on"
--5 minutes later--
Instructor: "The computer is typing in Chinese now"
Me: "oh the screen resolution is high so you can't read the text from the projector; It's still in english"
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